A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away…. four wild-eyed creators came together to bring to life an abomination to be their own personal purple monkey dishwasher as well as a protector from the evil space bots that threatened to steal their cookies and hoagies everyday between the hours of 9 and 5. For months they whipped out their test tubes, wore bras on their heads, told bad “that’s what she said” jokes and labored tirelessly calculating calculations that would bring life to their creature. With the calculating completed, the creators took all the nessecary componments and put them into the microwave for 3-4 minutes (or until hot). But then, only seconds into the cooking process, the microwave exploded sending shards of goo and plastic all over their la-bora-tory. The elder of the four creators stood up, pointed to the ceiling in protest and proclaimed “That is why I eat my lunches cold!” However, when the dust settled and the goo was gone, they noticed a large goofy mass with thick classes and torn up Vans sitting in their supply closet eating their cookies and scanning their images. “Its Alive!!!!!” celebrated the creators in unison, while also dancing in circles and handing out fives up high. No longer would the creators have to clean their own dishes and enter deadly four square battles with the evil space bots. Unfortunately for the creators, as time went by they began to notice that their creation was no purple monkey dishwater at all!!! He was nothing but ME, DARTH INTERN!!! a design loving, sci-fi moving watching, nacho munching creator similar to themselves, except with a lower skill-set of course. Despite their disappointment, the four creators vowed to take me in for the upcoming months with the hope of rearing my abilities and raising my creator status to a more professional level (while also scamming on some sweet free intern labor). So that is my story. I know it sounds ridiculous and very untrue (which it may very well be) and many of you will take me as a kook (which I may very well be), but at least take my advice: Never cook an abomination in the microwave on high in a non-microwave safe bowl or you’ll come face to face with the wrath of DARTH INTERN!!!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!!! MUAHAHAHA!!!!! MUAAHAHAHA!!!!!!….Oh! By the way, as for the space bots, the creators let them give me wedgies for a few hours during the day so they can eat their hoagies and cookies in peace.
until next time,
this is Darth Intern signing out.
Note: Darth Intern is really just Frank LeClair our newest intern from the New England School of Art and Design. The story above is entirely fictional and any resemblance to actual peoples is entirely coincidental and weird. To learn more of Darth Intern and his crackpot ideas visit his website at www.frankleclair.com. But don’t tell him we told you his secret identity.